Another celebrity insults the intelligence of children everywhere

via bookshelves of doom:

Josie Bisset, from Melrose Place fame, has written a children’s book.  You know, because anyone can.  It’s called Tickle Monster.  Okay, nothing inherently wrong so far.  It’s about a monster from outer space who brings joys the world over by tickling kids.  A tad creepy, sure.  But I’m willing to keep an open mind.  Then I read some excerpts from the sneak preview on her website.  Take a gander:

     “I just need a moment, as a matter of factly*.

     To scheme where I’ll tickle you next exactly.

     I’ll tell you a secret, you sweet little pea.

     It’s time to tickle your………….. (turn the page)

     Cute boney knee!”

*emphasis added by me.

Yeah.  No.  Oh god.  Won’t someone please think of the children????

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